Thinking back

Thinking back, I feel my life planning has been reasonably satisfactory so far. I'm able to pursue something that's my passion and hobby while making a living out of it. Even so, I still regard I have reached a crossroad. While pondering on which direction to go, other people are suffering from other problems and mistakes made in their life.

I heard of a young girl who is facing the prospect of aborting her unborn child. She's one of my relatives in fact. This is of course an act of murder if it is carried out. Oh well, the choices people face, not many are in the spirit of giving and sacrifice. Hope the baby lives, or, she feels peace for whatever the decision she makes. We need more love in this world.

Happy for a friend

Recently I attended a young friend's graduation ceremony. She's 24 and I envy her youth and passion. She and those graduates around me made me walk down my memory lane to evoke emotional scenes from my yesteryears. I was young and hot-headed and always yearned for my parents to leave me alone. That was the rebellious time when I dearly wanted freedom away from the home. Soon I rented a house to begin my painting career.

While I looked at my friend while she introduced her own piece of work, I could see the maturity in her years. As a friend, I'm exceedingly happy for her deep down in my heart. I wish angels will bless her in her path so that she will be successful for herself and her family.

Journey in life is always faced with unknown obstacles and she's the only one who can know what she has gone and experienced through. I hope she's known herself better through these tests and does her best to strive forward and never give up. I'd be there to support her if she needs.

Dream interpretation

Regarding dreams, I think it is good to consult a dream interpreter or a psychic. Sometimes we don't feel comfortable discussing with loved ones especially if they are in the dreams and the dreams happen to be a bad one. In this case, it is good to talk to a stranger for the interpretation. Many times, the best dream interpretation come from people who don't know you, and, thus, are able to take an objective point of view from your dream.

Suffocating dream

Last night I had a 'suffocating' dream! Is this a spiritual dream sent by Marie Callas?

I was in a packed bus standing and hands grabbing the metal pole to steady myself. Around me were some of my friends but they were like complete strangers to me. I looked and said hi to them and they did not even turn around to acknowledge me! **light bulbs are twirling my heads! **

Suddenly, I felt a choking feeling gradually. My gosh, the air conditioning of the bus had been tuned to the lowest with barely any air streams coming out from the vents. *HELP HELP* I was beginning to feel suffocated. YES, seriously! There was no air coming out and my face was turning cold. I kept grabbing my throat trying to gasp for some oxygen molecules. I looked at my friends, they were behaving like nothing was happening to them, it made me even more panicked! Did they see me really? I felt I am dying...

Then I woke up, and i still felt that choking and suffocating feeling. What a close shave! Walked to the kitchen and had a glass of warm water and why does this weird dream mean?

Why is my creative brain always churns out uncanny dreamscape for me to feel panicky in my sleeps? Maybe I will put that dream as a painting.

Forgetful

Lately, I've been feeling forgetful. You know you are forgetful when things and numbers that are firmly in your brains begin to perform disappearing acts. Yeah, it is easy to forget things. Just a couple of days ago, as usual I go to my ATM machine nearby to draw out some cash to pay for my drawing materials, and no matter how i tried to recall, I just couldn't get the PIN right. I flipped over my notes and phone contacts, but it was not to be found. For years I've been able to key in the number but why now I can't remember the PIN number? Am I suffering from your memory lapse?

My new printer works great and I have been printing many pictures from it over the weekend. As the result, the ink tank level has dropped alarmingly! Why did it drop so fast? They are darn expensive!

New printer

Yesterday I bought a printer because my old one had not been printing as smooth as it was like before. The new new printer is one of those all-in-one machine that can print, scan, copy and fax and it works amazingly well - it prints beautifully. However, like every other printer I've owned; the colour I was seeing on my monitor was much more vibrant.

I played around with the different calibration procedures according to the manual but... i gave up as it was getting nowhere.

Today I'm going to draw about a garden scene and I printed out in full colour a garden photo I took somewhere; that will be my inspiration and focus. As I have done many times before; I overlaid some textures, in this instance from the garden and swimming pool

I know... a bit brash, but I love it all the same.

A painting from my younger days

Today I would like to show you a photo of one of my fav paintings which I completed when I was still a novice in my painting career. It was a oil painting of the sea coast I visited and I drew it while sitting at the bench besides the beach. The weather on that day was perfect and the breezy morning made it a really mesmerising experience. It was that nice!

Now as I look at this picture again, there is a sense of nostalgia overcoming me as the picture reveals the mood of my younger days and there's a surreal feel to it. If I go back to the place again, I believe it will come out completely different.

It's a quiet time

The country is in a stand down! The town and shops have practically shut down for the Easter holidays. Everyone has gone merrying at this very long weekend. For me, I attended a church mass with a friend who introduced me to his yearly spiritual sojorn. As a good friend of course I obliged and while I was there, the solemn atmosphere turns him to a person who is unlike of his normal character. I've never seen him as serious at this moment before mind you.

I think more people are starting to catch up on the spiritual side of life as the country progresses and people get more affluent. Easter is a time which is more religious than Christmas and you can see more people showing repentence and asking for forgiveness.

What I gonna be doing this long holiday? I won't be going anywhere but catching up with a couple of friends who stay nearby for a chit chat session and of course thinking of ideas for my next drawing.

I stay here

The picture here is the famous statues here in the city where I live in Geelong which is the second biggest city here in Victoria after Melbourne. This is really a nice place to be in. We've everything we need in life and it is not crowded too as compared to bigger cities. Perfectly fine for me to find new creativities and inspirations for paintings. If I'm devoid of ideas, a drive to the beautiful coastline or hilly forested terrains nearby will really recharge me. It's part of the spiritual healing too!

Goldfish in my place

Here is a picture of my goldfish swimming nonchalantly in the well-decorated tank. Rearing goldfish is actually a hobby of my husband and since he's not around anymore, I have taken up the task of rearing and maintaining the fish. The hardest part is of course the tank cleaning but I 'm used to that by now. There are actually two more bigger tanks but I have given the fish there to some fish hobbyists and sold the tanks. The maintenance chore is too much for me alone.

Sometimes I thought I can feel his presence around the tank, his backview, profile and of course that familiar guy scene. My eyes are red again..... well, I'd better think of something else.

When I'm bored, I'd sit in front of the tank to read the papers, have some food while watching them swim. At least that's one way I can do to cherish the memories.

Anxious wait for Marie Callas

From the moment I sent in my form to Marie Callas to the moment where I waited for her reply was one of the most nervous times I ever had in my life. Naturally you would feel regretful after doing something that was an unknown however I told myself to keep a positive faith. The wait last for nearly 25 days and in Marie Callas letter to me, she wrote a detailed description of my mental state of affairs.

'Wow' as I as astonished by her accuracy because that's how I felt exactly at that time. Marie Callas also gave me a talisman for me to carry it at all times. All I just need to do was to write my wishes in this talisman and performed some simple rituals to get it 'working' for me.